[FRESH HELL: 86 IT FROM ORBIT] it may have won nanowrimo 2013 but at what cost [6/6]

[omaewokorosu]

FRESH HELL: 86 IT FROM ORBIT
it may have won nanowrimo 2013 but at what cost
Part 1 | Part 2 | Part 3 | Part 4 | Part 5 | Part 6

Previously on Fresh Hell: 86 It From Orbit:

I’m tired of all this political bullshit.
Then fucking abort your mission and leave the military and live in the mountains somewhere because unfortunately for you, politics is something that should matter to everyone because it effects everyone. 

If everyone was more honest about everything, there wouldn’t be a need for all this complicated bullshit.
how to tell me you have no idea how politics work without telling me you have no idea how politics work...

WELCOME BACK EVERYONE to part six (!!!) of it may have won nanowrimo 2013 but at what cost aka Let the Sun Fade Out. I am your host Karu, my co-host is purring her little head off cat loafed on my lap (but for how long?) because it is BLACK CAT DAY which tbh is every day in my house lmao

This is the last chapter pre-"soft reset" and will probably be the last one I do for a bit because I have a month long writing challenge to focus on lol

“You can’t go in there!” one OZ soldier shouted, as Heero pushed
I misread that as "punched", which honestly sounds like something Heero would do lmao 

his way through towards what was left of the base. “Kid!”
Heero flashed his ID and was let in with no questions asked.
“Where is she?”
The hustle and bustle stopped as they turned to gawk at him.
“Who let a kid in here?” one of them asked. “Go home, kid. There’s nothing to see here.”
“Yeah, scram!” said another. “You’ll get in the—”
“Lieutenant Aodhan.”
The two heckling soldiers stopped as Heero saluted Zechs, who has just entered the badly damaged entrance hall.
“Apologies for being out of uniform.”
Zechs shook his head before leading Heero deeper into the badly damaged base.
I thought it was a school?

“Noin wants to see you. She has a favour to ask.”
“What sort of—”
“Aodhan!”
what sort of name is ah-ohd-hahn

Arms encircled Heero and pulled him close.
you know I could get behind 1x9...

“L-Lucy…”
why is Heero calling her this everyone calls her "Noin"

“I’ll leave two alone,” Zechs said, before leaving.
p sure Zechs also left a word out
 
Noin pulled away.
“What happened?”
Noin frowned. “What didn’t happen?” She sat down on what Heero assumed was part of the wall. “We were attacked by a kid wanting to blow up our Tauruses. Ended up taking…” She sniffled, dabbing at her eyes.
“How many casualties?”
Noin said nothing.
“How many?”
Noin pursed her lips before looking Heero right in the eye.
“All of the trainees… Everyone in the south wing is okay, but that’s just regular military staff…” Her voice cracked. “They’re all gone, Aodhan… You’re the only one…”
boy it's gotta suck being the lone survivor of something...

Heero took one shaky breath.
“Zechs mentioned a favour.”
Noin nodded. “I collected all of the dog tags. I was wondering if you’d help me send them back to their families.” Noin, Heero could see, had one in her hand already. “For some, that’s all I could find.” She held out the one in her hand for Heero to take. The name on it said Thanos DeKatria.
“You and him were best friends, remember? Like Zechs and I… Nearly inseparable…” She smiled. “I’m sure it will mean a lot to his family to know that…someone who knew him and cared for him like a brother sent him home…”
I wish I could go "aww that's so sweet" and everything but like...I don't think y'all are the ones who handle this and also what kind of name is Thanos

Heero took it, squeezing it so hard it cut into his palm. His hand was shaking.
“It would be an honour.”
Noin got up and together, they walked to a much more stable part of the base, where they sat down at a table and, with dog tags in front of them, wrote their letters of condolence to the grieving families, each one more personal than the last.
I feel like this isn't something for like, even Noin to be doing? I feel like this would be something for the top brass to be doing, so like idk the head of OZ.

Heero had to rewrite his letter for Thanos at least four times because he kept smudging the ink, and Noin had to stop on more than one occasion. His next of kin was designated not as his mother, but as his girlfriend, the girl Thanos never shut up about. Heero had never met her, but felt like he knew her through Thanos’ stories.
Miss Bram Long,
WHY ARE WE USING THE NAME OF ONE OF RACHEL'S MILQUETOAST OCs?????????

The news I am about to tell you is not easy for me to write. I wish I could write of happier things and much better circumstances, but I am afraid that is not the case.
My name is Aodhan Clark, a fellow classmate and trainee of Thanos’. He and I were very close during our time together at Lake Victoria; I guess you could say we were best friends. It is with a heavy heart and a shaky hand that I inform you of his passing. The base at Lake Victoria was attacked and he tried to protect his fellow comrades, he died a hero, one who will never be forgotten. Due to the circumstances of his death, all that remained of him was his dog tag, which I have enclosed with this letter. He designated you as his next-of-kin, and as more details come to light, any further belongings will be released to you.
I am sorry I could not write to the girl Thanos never shut up about under happier circumstances. I am deeply sorry for your loss—speaking not as a soldier of OZ, but as one of his closest friends, his loss is most painful, and he will be greatly missed.

Respectfully yours,
Lt. Aodhan O. Clark
I skimmed this because like. I just feel like this is not, you know, protocol. It's kind of not professional. Like Heero could write this to his bestie's girlfriend or whatever but not on official fucking Organisation of the Zodiac stationery you know?

*

Heero placed a cup of tea in front of Noin before sitting down across from her.
she's gonna need something stronger than tea or even coffee there, bud

“Who did this?”
Noin wrapped her hands around the mug. “A boy, probably not much older than you. He piloted a Gundam.” Her hands were still shaking as she took a sip. Heero’s brow furrowed.
“The Gundams aren’t supposed to be attacking OZ.”
LIES
FAKE NEWS
MISINFORMATION

Noin drummed her fingertips on the sides of the mug.
“Aodhan… I don’t know exactly what they have you involved with, but please be careful.”
Heero stared into his coffee. “Lucy, I can come to you about anything, right?” Talk to you about anything?”
Noin’s head snapped up. “Of course. We’ve always had that sort of trust.” She leaned over the table. “Is something wrong? Are you in trouble?”
“To be honest, I don’t even know anymore.” He met her gaze. “Dekim Barton chose me for some top secret mission… And that mission is Operation M.”
Heero: I'm just gonna spill all of the tea about my secret mission why the fuck not

Noin’s eyes widened slightly.
“You mean…”
“But here’s where it gets weird,” Heero continued. “There was supposed to be four others. So far I’ve met one, and the one who attacked here last night said he was one, so there are supposedly two others I don’t know much about. The one I met said we were fighting for the Colonies, but that’s not what I was told. I was told I was helping to pave the way for OZ.” He paused for a moment to sip at his coffee.
“I’ve been getting a lot of conflicting orders lately. Ones to help OZ, ones to harm. I don’t even know who to ask—I’m not supposed to question anything. Am I fighting for OZ or is Operation M something entirely different than I was told?”
SOMETHING ENTIRELY DIFFERENT THAN YOU WERE TOLD

“Are you asking if you were tricked?”
Heero nodded.
“You’re not fighting for OZ if you’re piloting a Gundam. Perhaps some of them, because they are originally from the Colonies, rebelled. You are fighting for Dekim, for Romefeller. And thought OZ is backed by Romefeller, it really has nothing to do with us.”
“So then what do I do?” He couldn’t just leave the mission—he’d be labeled a deserter.
“Talk to Colonel Treize. Maybe he can pull some strings. Either that or you figure out what you could do.”
“What I could do?”
“Your father… He’s from Earth, right? And your mother, though she also worked for OZ, was from L1, correct?”
Heero nodded.
“I think you need to figure out where your heart belongs—with them or with us.”
“What are we declaring those pilots?”
“Traitors, of course. That’s the word from the higher ups—higher than Treize, even. An execution order has been placed on the one who attacked, and if we find any more, I’m sure the same thing will happen. If you decide to stay with Dekim, I’m sure you’ll be fine because you’re on our side.” She frowned. “I’d hate to see you as my enemy, Aodhan. You were one of my best students.”
There’s no easy solution, Heero thought. Or any solution, really. What kind of mess did Dekim pull me into?
I got nothing for commentary here because like. No matter how much you slice this it doesn't make sense like I have no idea how to even make this make sense.

*

I need to get out of here.
The gloomy atmosphere was getting to Heero, and as supportive as he wanted to be, he could only take so much. He had to discuss some things with Treize, see if he could offer any sort of insight to the situation, maybe tell everyone that pilot Zero One of Wing Gundam was not a threat and that he was with OZ.
okay but I'm sure that would get back to, you know, the scientists or at least some of their pilots, and then you'd be in deep doo-doo right? I feel like this is an unwinnable situation you've found yourself in here. Renamed Heero.

Or maybe abort the whole thing all together.
That's the sanest thing you've even fucking said.

He sent Treize a quick email so his arrival wouldn’t be a complete surprise. He made sure he was in proper military dress, because the last thing he needed anyone to think was that he was trying to sneak in and kill one of Romefeller’s top aristocrats. Heero pulled at the cuffs of his uniform, smoothed out any wrinkles as he waited in what the butler said was the parlour before he was sent for. Even in uniform he still felt wildly out of place, like the uniform wasn’t meant to be worn by him.
Perhaps it was a sign.
"This is your sign that you were meant to be a terrorist for space."

“What did you need to see me about?” Treize didn’t even go through with the formalities.
“It’s about my assignment.”
Treize leaned back in his chair. “What about it?”
“I’ve been informed that this whole Operation M is nothing but a crock of bull.” Heero clenched his jaw. “The Gundam pilots, all of whom are supposed to have the same objectives as I do—they’re fighting for the Colonies, they’re attacking OZ.”
BECAUSE THAT IS LITERALLY OPERATION M 2.0

“I’ve heard reports of that, yes.”
Treize sounds like he couldn't give more of a fuck about everything going on rn lmao

Heero stood in the middle of the room. “So then what the hell is my role in all of this?”
Treize: ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

Treize said nothing, just left his chair and went over to the window.
To the windooooooow to the wall

Why is Treize always either sitting or staring out a window in this like. is he an NPC?

“Am I a soldier for OZ, fighting under your name and banner, or am I just some toy for Dekim?”
“Operation M,” Treize said, as he drew back the heavy looking drape,
wait so he's been staring at a fucking curtain this whole time??? 

“is not of my design. I don’t know why Dekim chose you, just like I don’t know why those other pilots have rebelled. Are you asking to come back to me, Aodhan?”
Heero pursed his lips, eyes burning holes into Treize’s back.
“Would I have a purpose as a soldier? Because I’m not seeing exactly what it is I’m fighting for.”
I'm not even seeing what the fuck you're supposed to be fighting for tbh

Treize turned towards him. “If you want a purpose, I have a mission for you.” He moved away from the window. “The Vice Foreign Minister… He had a daughter with him when he was assassinated. I received word she escaped unharmed.”
“And?”
“Complete the job.”
that's a hefty thing to entrust some rookie with

“And what about Operation M?”
“Consider it aborted, especially since it’s not being carried out according to plan.”
I wish this fic got aborted tbh

“And the Gundam?”
Treize smirked. “Consider that your personal mobile suit. You have my permission to keep it.”
????

Does Treize even have the authority to do that???

Heero saluted. “Thank you, Colonel.”
“And after that, you need to gear up for space. You’ll be stationed there for a while. I figured a Colonist like you wouldn’t mind.”
Heero nodded.
“You may go.”
Heero didn’t need to be told twice. He didn’t plan on staying any longer than he had to.
Assassinate the Vice Foreign Minister’s daughter… Darlian.
He was halfway back to his transport when he stopped.
That girl. He scoffed. I know I should’ve killed her.
WHY

YOU HAD LITERALLY NO REASON TO DO SO????

Which meant it was back to Lake Victoria, where he’d stashed his Gundam, and then back to Japan. And then once that was done, he’d be heading back to space.
Maybe I can stay with Noin for a bit before having to head off, he thought. She probably wants to hear how the meeting went.

*

Duo hadn’t received any missions in a while, and though that meant he could do as he pleased with his free time, it also meant he had too much free time. He was a dog on a rather long leash—he could go where he wanted, providing he didn’t try to bite through his tether. He hadn’t felt this caged since he was back on L2.
Same cage, different scenery, he thought. Unlike others his age, Duo was currently wasting away the hours at a rusted over, overgrown, seemingly abandoned playground, arms cradling his head as Duo lay on top of a see-saw that was so covered in rust the hinge didn’t even move. He had no idea how long it’d been abandoned for or why.
Probably the war caused the children to flee. He would’ve killed for something like this when he was younger. Kids like him were less interested in playing with other kids and more focused on just surviving.
I believe that tbh considering Duo grew up in the slums...

He sighed as he toyed with the crucifix around his neck. He never did find that other necklace. He wasn’t really upset, but that meant he’d either lost it in a wormhole, or someone took it. And after having Gundam parts stolen, he was pretty sure Heero was the one who stole it. Duo smirked.
I left such an impression on you that you wanted a keepsake to remember me by, huh? You could’ve just asked. He watched the clouds lazily roll by.
Heero… I wonder wha you’re up to? Hopefully you’re not my enemy… I’d hate to bump into you and have to fight you. Do you ever look up at the sky and think of me? He snorted. I doubt it. But it’s a nice thought all the same, and flattering as hell to boot.
Duo’s phone beeped, alerting him of a new message. He sat up and sighed before taking out his phone and reading it.
but we will not be told what the message said or if it's even important

Sometimes I wonder why I signed up for this sort of thing. I did have a choice. A lot of choice, really.
not really you didn't have much of a choice lmao

He pocketed the phone before climbing off the see-saw.
Did you have a choice, Heero? Did you choose the other path?

*

Heero opted to not detour to Lake Victoria. Nothing had changed since he’d last been there. He stopped for his Gundam, but didn’t make his presence known at all, only because Noin would want him to stay longer—or indefinitely. He sat in Wing for a little while, hands on the controls, and stared at the screen.
No matter who I fight for, I always end up being nothing more than somebody’s plaything. And for some reason, I end up going along with it, because this is the only way I know how to live.
idk if this actually makes sense tbh like I get the soldier mentality of "I just follow orders" but... idk if like, Heero's mentality for things fits Renamed Heero's...

He flew off to his next location, a place he never thought he’d return to.
Saint Gabriel Academy.

*

The students were silent at Heero’s arrival, not that he cared. They’d probably wondered where’d he’d been, when he’d be coming back—if he’d even be coming back. He simply ignored them, because what business of it was theirs? But of course there were always the token few who would just have to ask, because maybe Heero was one of those rich kids pulled from school at a moment’s notice to jetset halfway around the world because of his father’s, or both parents’ jobs.
is this shade on Relena lmao

“Where have you been, Heero?”
On this particular night, Heero was in one of the rooms the headmaster had previously let him stay in. Saint Gabriel was one of those schools where students who lived too far away could board there at an additional price. Of course Heero wasn’t paying them, hadn’t been paying them, though the computer system said otherwise. No one aside from the headmaster knew where he was staying however, so he had no idea how or why Relena Darlian was there. Especially since he had to kill her and he preferred not doing it, well, here in the place where he was sleeping.
wait so Relena was waiting for him in his fucking dorm room??? 

Or planning on it.
“Sick,” Heero answered, his voice soft, the lie smooth and easy on his tongue. “But you know that, so why are you asking?” He hadn’t made any attempts at eye contact, just kept his focus on his laptop screen instead. Details on Relena’s father’s murder were opened in various browser tabs. This one passing mention by Treize was the only time he’d ever heard of it, and as the media was wont to do, blamed it on the Gundam pilots.
that wasn't the media that was OZ pinning the blame on the Colonies for his assassination...

He wasn’t necessarily surprised, given they were doing Dekim’s dirty work—or that’s what Operation Meteor essentially was on paper. The Gundam pilots had been rebelling against it from the beginning. Colonel Une had released a beautifully rendered statement befitting a higher up of OZ that looked and sounded sincere, but Heero knew deep down it was full of shit. No Gundam pilot had done this, and since Heero was no longer technically considered one—in OZ’s eyes at least—this was the work of OZ, covered by up OZ, and blamed on someone else so OZ’s reputation wasn’t wounded.
and you're okay with what OZ is doing???

But then again… Heero remembered the incident at Lake Victoria. Had that really been a Gundam pilot Noin went up against? What if it wasn’t? What if it was someone who currently was, or had been in the past, a soldier fighting by their side who ended up rebelling? But Lucrezia was too smart to be fooled by something like that. A boy like that? Someone Heero’s age? He would have been a fellow classmate and Lucy would have known who he was.
Still, to judge all of the Gundam pilots based off of that… Then again, they’d been attacking OZ and Alliance military bases… This whole situation was making his head hurt.
SAME BECAUSE I HAVE NO IDEA WHAT THE FUCK IS EVEN HAPPENING 

If it wasn’t OZ, why would Treize ask him to kill the daughter of an extremely high profile politician? What did she know that made her a risk to OZ?
“Your father…”
Relena shook her head. “Don’t. I've done my grieving over him.
HE DIED LIKE YESTERDAY WHAT DO YOU MEAN 

It would accomplish nothing to keep crying over him. He would want me to be strong, strong for my mother, for my classmates.”
“He advocated peace between Earth and the Colonies.”
Relena nodded.
"That's considered a threat?”
INDEPENDENCE IS A THREAT TO THE UESA, YEAH omg he knows fucking nothing

Relena sat down on the bed next to him. “Peace is always a threat to those whose only desires and business is war.”
“And that’s why…”
Relena nodded as she pursed her lips. “My father… He told me to beware Romefeller, to not trust OZ, and yet… And yet I see you, a soldier for OZ, and I see nothing but kindness in your eyes.”
you sure about that because I think he's a dillhole myself 

She paused, as if to collect her thoughts. “As a Colonist, you should know just how important peace between Earth and space is.”
IT'S NOT JUST ABOUT PEACE

Heero cocked an eyebrow, as if to ask, how did you know?
“The way you look at all the natural wonders of Earth, simple things like how blue the sky is or how the trees sway in the wind… People from Earth don’t understand, don’t realise, don’t see how beautiful Earth really is.” She looked him straight in the eye.
“You’ve come back to kill me, haven’t you, Heero?”
Heero said nothing.
“It’s okay if you are. You said you would, because I know too much about you, so before you do it, I want you to know that the media, that Colonel Une, everything in the news about my father’s assassination is a lie. It wasn’t a Gundam pilot I saw.”
why would Heero need to come back to kill Relena outside of "because he was ordered to" like he had no reason to kill her otherwise because she really had no reason to even know he was on the dock or whatever

Heero blinked. “You were there?”
Relena nodded. “Colonel Une was the one who did it.”
Heero showed nothing. “I already knew that.”
That’s why I have to kill you tonight.
"Because Une done fucked up and I have to correct her mistake."

“You had a glimmer of hope though that maybe you were wrong for once.” Relena left the bed and moved to the centre of the room.
"You're wrong,” Heero said.
“What about?”
“About there being any kindness in me. Perhaps there was, a long, long time ago.” He stood, unholstering his gun. “But that part of me died ten years ago."
does maths

When you were four??

When my own fellow Colonists brutally killed my mother.
I mean she did work for OZ...

He aimed, and Relena made no move to run, or alert anyone, she simply stood there, awaiting death. He cocked his Beretta and half squeezed the trigger when his cellphone rang.
You don't need to cock the Beretta the hammer goes back as you squeeze the trigger. Like you can so that there is less pull required but it's not necessary.

He answered it.
“Yeah?” I’m kind of in the middle of something.
“Lieutenant Aodhan.” It was Treize. “Stop what you are doing.”
Heero’s gun arm wavered, but only slightly. “Why?”
“I am canceling your current assignment.”
Heero pulled the phone away from his ear, a look of bewilderment on his face there briefly before he regained his composure.
“What exactly changed in the past few hours?”
“I don’t have to tell you why, Aodhan. You are to follow orders and not ask those things. Head to space. You’ll receive further instruction when you get there. Is that understood?”
Heero said nothing at first.
“Is that understood, Lieutenant? Don’t tell me you killed her already.”
IT'S FUNNY YOU SHOULD SAY THAT, SIR.

“I have not.”
“Good. Then follow orders.”
Heero hung up the phone and resisted the urge to throw it. He reupholstered
???

his gun after decocking it and re-engaging the safety.
So not only does Heero use a holster in this but he also uses the safety???

“It’s your lucky day, Relena.”
She turned around. “Will you stay?”
“No. I have more important things to do than play pretend with you.”
Sometimes the dialogue is so spot on but then I have to remember that this is supposed to be AU Heero. 

He closed his laptop, shoved it back in its bag.
“Then before you go… At least be my date to the school dance tonight.”
wait didn't we already do episode 6??? 

She moved closer. “Play pretend for just a little longer…or will you turn into a pumpkin at midnight?”
Heero exhaled softly, mentally weighing his options.
“And thank you,” Relena said, entwining their fingers as they left his room, “for not killing me instead of obeying orders.”
WHY ARE THEY HOLDING HANDS???

Heero sighed. “Yeah, sure.” What a thing to thank someone for.
If OZ could stop jerking his too short leash this way and that, maybe he could figure out a little easier what the hell was going on. Maybe that was the point, maybe they didn’t want him to know. That was why they kept him guessing, kept him in the dark.
YOU'RE A SOLDIER YOU'RE NOT SUPPOSED TO KNOW MOST THINGS JUST FOLLOW ORDERS

If he knew the truth, maybe he’d be like these other pilots, like Duo, too.
Maybe there is a way to lengthen the leash without the masters noticing. It would be extremely risky, involving some hacking into extremely secure areas of OZ he had no clearance codes for. But without knowing exactly what the hell he was fighting for after being told one thing or another, Heero was beginning to think on his own.
well that's a dangerous thing for a soldier to do: freely think

As a perfect weapon for OZ,
lmao this is far from perfection 

that made him extremely dangerous, especially as an enemy. It was extremely risky, but he had to make these decisions now. Whether to stay with OZ or rebel against them.

*

Heero had no idea what kind of shit OZ was pulling anymore, and he knew first hand what sort of shit was going on.
I feel like this sentence makes fuck all sense 

Or at least, he was beginning to figure it out. All he knew was he saw mobile suits on the horizon heading for the school.
didn't we...didn't we do this already??? 

Students were screaming, running inside for cover, all except for Relena, who was as calm as could be as she ushered classmates inside.
“Heero?”
Heero grit his teeth. What kind of shit are they pulling? ARe they really going to attack a school full of civilians?
Heero ran to where he’d hidden his Gundam and immediately got on the Com Link.
“What the hell are you doing?” Heero asked.
“Who the hell are you?”
“Lieutenant Aodhan Clark of Specials,” Heero answered.
“Who are you and who is the superior who ordered the attack?”
He heard someone scoff. “If you were from OZ, you’d know we’re trying to show exactly how terrible those Gundam pilots are!”
uh no in this episode you're trying to kill Relena Darlian and pin it on the Gundams idiot

“So you’re attacking a school?”
“We’re protecting it. And from the looks of things it needs it since they’ve gone as far as impersonating dead OZ soldiers!”
Heero blinked. Dead?
congrats Renamed Heero you're free

“Last I checked I was alive and well. Go back to base. I’ll see to it that whoever gave those orders is spoken to.”
The mobile suits didn’t move.
“Do I need to repeat myself?”
“She’s over there!” he heard, before they disconnected communications. Figures. He sat there in his cockpit in mild disbelief. Hadn’t they heard Treize’s orders? The assassination plot was canceled, so why…? Why were they going to try to kill Relena, Heero was confused.
ME TOO, RENAMED HEERO

ME TOO

God what a fucking nightmare this whole thing was.

IN DECEMBER... I will type up the "soft reset" which will...maybe make more sense than this travesty? Maybe? For now though that's...that's it.