[FRESH HELL: 86 IT FROM ORBIT] it may have won nanowrimo 2013 but at what cost [3/6]

[omaewokorosu]

FRESH HELL: 86 IT FROM ORBIT
it may have won nanowrimo 2013 but at what cost
Part 1 | Part 2 | Part 3 | Part 4 | Part 5 | Part 6

Previously on Fresh Hell: 86 It From Orbit:

His uncle ‘half-asssed his way to glory’ (according to his father). He looked up at the screen, poised and ready.
Test me all you want, he thought, as the screens lit up. I’ll prove I’m not worthless.
DO YOU KNOW WHAT THIS DOOHICKEY IS CALLED???

like Seis Clark, who is Heero's stepfather in FT, created the goddamn Leo, and you are telling me renamed Heero is like IDK WHAT ANYTHING IS in a fucking mobile suit cockpit???

WELCOME BACK EVERYONE to part three of Karu is Going to End Up With a Drinking Problem Again and It's Fanfiction's Fault aka Let the Sun Fade Out. I am your host Karu, speaking to you at 0538 because despite me taking melatonin at like, 0300, I am only kind of sleepy. So why not do this as my cat makes biscuits on my thigh???

I had my trusty spork on standby but it's become quite clear to me that the buster rifle is needed as the spork is not powerful enough for *gestures vaguely* whatever the fuck this travesty is.

"But Karu, you still can't wield the buster rifle without a Gundam, and you don't even know how to pilot one!"
I am probably better at piloting Wing than "Aodhan" is lmao considering he doesn't know what the fuck anything is even called.

Daylight had barely arrived when a knock on his door jolted him from his sleep. Aodhan’s heart beat wildly
just wild beat
communication
ame ni— 

in his chest before he could just make out the metallic limbs of Dr. J.
“Meet me at the lab in ten minutes.”
The automatic door slid shut and Aodhan was left to his thoughts. He took several slow, deep breaths in order to calm down as he raked a hand through his hair before swinging his legs over the side and getting up. He pulled out a pair of shorts and an all too big t-shirt before slipping his feet into heavy boots meant to keep him a little more grounded.
no socks or anything??? you're just asking for awful blisters, aren't you 

The ‘living area’, if it could be called that, was low gravity for the most part. He took a quick glance in the mirror, ignoring the bandages on his arms,
why does he always have bandages on his arms is he trying out a new aesthetic or something??? 

before leaving his bedroom and gliding with the aid of hand rails on the walls, down the halls. Five minutes later and he punched in the security code to gain access to much more restricted areas. No stairs or anything were around, just a gradual incline of the floor and more hand rails. Aodhan, thanks to his boots, could walk more than glide, but he kept one hand on a railing just to be safe.
This area was dimly lit, and compounding the dim lights was the fact that there weren’t even a lot of them, which of course posed a problem. Dr. J was in front of the lab, that deranged looking grin on his face as his prosthetic hand
it's not just his hand. it's his arm. he has a prosthetic arm that resembles the fucking claw on a crane machine game you'd find in an arcade 

was clasped behind his back. His prosthetic legs kept him firm on the floor.
I don't think his legs are fake I think those are leg braces

“I hope you’re well rested,” Dr J said, as he guided Aodhan down the labyrinth that was the hallways leading to even more private areas.
“Today I’m sending you on a little…training assignment. Dekim wants to test you in a setting with less control and more…variations.” Dr J’s voice lowered. “Between you and me, he sometimes forgets that reality throws our plans awry most of the time. You can’t control other people, you know.”
Dr. J punched in yet another code and Aodhan entered a room filled with huge screens, each with different things scrolling across them. Dr. J took a seat in front of a computer terminal, and typed in a few things—Aodhan assumed they were access codes—before pulling up a couple of documents.
“Dekim wants you to check out an abandoned mobile suit factory.
you mean a military base? it's not abandoned. 

He doesn’t want people to get any ideas and start building their own suits to try and fight against us.
LOL what??? 

He wants you to destroy it when night falls.
did my younger self not realise that there really isn't "day" and "night" in the Colonies? like yeah you have day and night cycles but that's all artificial, it's not like Earth where these things naturally occur thanks to Earth's rotation. It's, to put in simple terms, like turning a light on and then off 12 hours later. 

You’ll be less likely to be detected by anyone under cover of darkness.”
Aodhan nodded. “Just another test to benefit the boss.”
hey hey we don't talk about the family okay we don't know who's listening in 

He looked from the screen to Dr J. “When do I go?”
“Right now. The mobile suit factory
it's a military base 

is pretty derelict now, an eyesore on the other side of the colony. ‘Prove that you’re worth spending more valuable resources on,’ are his words.
Aodhan glided away towards the door.
“I’ll report to you once I’ve completed the mission.”
This whole thing is otherwise really fucking boring lmao also this isn't how it fucking happens in Episode Zero.

*

It was a picture perfect day outside. There were no clouds in the sky at all.

There are clouds but they're only there really so that when you look up you're not just seeing more of the Colony. Even though you still see, you know, the other side of the Colony.

The sky itself was as clear and blue as it could be.
Sky...?



You mean this? That's not sky, that's the walls of the Colony. Like yeah I guess you could consider that "sky" but it's still not the right fucking colour lmao 

Everything looked so vibrant…and artificial compared to what he’d seen on Earth.
All this was a shoebox filled with all the things necessary for civilization. A Lego recreation of things found on Earth, complete with plastic trees and grass to complete the look.



The grass may be more like astroturf? At least in appearance? But it's real and just not drawn realistically, like individual blades or whatever, because you have to remember that GW and EW were cel-animated, so the backgrounds are all static; if you wanted individual blades of grass to get stepped on or whatever, you had to bust out another sheet of acetate and draw it and animate it. Grass doesn't move or bunch up when Heero steps on it for instance. But it's all real. Those are Actual Trees and Actual Flowers. The grass, the flowers, the trees and shrubs, the fucking birds??? all real. Like a lot of shit is obviously going to need to be artificially made like gravity and you have life support systems and climate controls and all that fun stuff, but the nature shit? That's aaaaaall natural.

He made his way down the street, his eyes constantly scanning his surroundings, looking for threats. A good soldier was always constantly aware of everything around them. It’d keep him alive.
He passed by a park filled with kids and their parents, all smiles as they laughed and played in sandboxes or were pushed on swings. He felt nothing when he saw this, no twinge of longing over a childhood that he could scarcely remember anymore. No feeling of missing out over seeing fathers playing catch with their kids when his own was too busy doing military operations to spend much time with him. Nothing.
Well that's fucking sad because if I wrote Heero's flashback now and it had him watching kids wandering around the greenspaces I would have him filled with a bittersweet sense of missing out on something like episode 6 where he was watching his classmates running off to this big party and the look he gives is just. well. look:

before he fucking hardens up after turning away because he is a teenager, he is 15 years old, he should be out there running around with them getting ready for the school dance like every normal fucking high schooler but he can't because he isn't one of them despite being a 15 year old; he's not a student, he's a Gundam pilot; he's not worrying about school assignments or homework, he's worrying over whether the next battle will kill him or not. This would be his expression watching kids running around in a park without a fuck to give in the world before he remembers, "Oh yeah, I'm not one of them. I never was one of them." And that's heartbreaking. That would be heartbreaking even years later when he looks back on this moment, "I could never be one of them, and I hate that I could never just be a normal teenager worrying about whether or not I passed that history test or that pop quiz in English class, and having that be the worst thing that could ever happen to me, a poor grade or failing a class. Maybe I'd get grounded. Maybe I'd end up in summer school. Whatever the case, I would have a normal teen experience. But I was never allowed to have that, because I was too busy fighting for the Colonies to be independent and free."

fucking 0630 and I am METAING ABOUT HEERO what is my life

The training was working, apparently. He shoved his hands in his pockets and kept on going. He could see the tops of what looked like a factory looming in the distance. Heads of what were probably mobile suits stared off into the distance. He could see why Dekim thought it could be a potential threat. Someone could fix up a suit or two and thwart Dekim’s plans.
IT'S A MILITARY BASE.

First step: check out the target. Assess any risks.
He arrived at a ten foot tall chain link fence with barbed wire twisted around the top to discourage anyone hopping over it.

10 foot tall? Yeah I could see that considering it's like double Heero's height and he is 5'2" but there is no razor wire lmao

To him this represented a challenge. He climbed it, crouched down a bit below the barbed wire top, assessing his options.
Slip over it or jump? He moved carefully in order to not get stuck by the wire before jumping, landing on the balls of his feet before leaning forward into a roll.
The old mobile suit factory was indeed falling apart as Dr J said. Windows were boarded up in some places and completely missing in others. Bricks were missing, lying in a pile on the ground. The mobile suits themselves were rusted to the point where their only destination would be a scrap yard. He doubted they’d even work.
good to know urban blight is a thing even in space 

He walked across what was once probably a lawn of some kind and threw the doors open. Dust particles stirred up and he covered his nose with his arm, trying hard to not cough. Nothing inside that was useful or worth anything.
I am p sure this is an active military base lmao 

There were squatters, of course, huddled around a makeshift campfire. He’d thought to warn them this place would be blown all the way to hell, but he didn’t care about these people at all. It was their fault for living somewhere they shouldn’t be.
Renamed Heero: Fuck the homeless. 

I cannot stress how OOC that is for Heero because like. He doesn't want to just have a bunch of innocent people die when he could've...idk...done something about it?

Casualties were necessary, death was necessary, especially for people like this.
this dickbag really is just like "you know what the homeless should die, actually"

who the fuck are you sir

where is your mother so I can tell her what a fucking awful job she did raising you???

But whose thinking was that? That death didn’t matter as long as the mission was successfully completed?
Probably some bad news at his school or something.

I have so many kids' mothers to scold I guess

Aodhan scratched at the bandages, trying to pull them off so he could let the poison seep out. Dekim’s poison was slowly corrupting him.
WHAT BANDAGES

But wasn’t it supposed to be this way?
It doesn’t even matter, he thought. Something like me is just supposed to obey and carry out orders. What I think is irrelevant.
This is such a strange thing to read because like. We get these glimmers of Heero's character that are actually IC??? and then it just goes to shit again, it's very frustrating. Not to mention whiplash inducing.

He crept around the perimeter a bit, trying to find a place where he might be able to place explosives. He had basic materials to MacGuyver something together and rig it to explode remotely.
Whilst I firmly believe Heero could (and probably did) have to DIY his own explosives, more than likely he was given the tools to do so and it was up to him to place them in the appropriate spots so that it would do the appropriate things and give him the result he wanted. 

He found a couple of spots. He’d probably have to gather more supplies—one explosive wouldn’t take the whole thing down. Three or four were more likely.
HE ONLY BROUGHT ONE EXPLOSIVE???

what a fucking amateur

He looked again at the squatters, reached behind him for the holstered gun inside the waistband of his shorts.
LMAO Heero using a fucking holster in his shorts that's fucking hilarious like seriously


(From episode 2.)

WHAT HOLSTER DO YOU SPEAK OF IN HIS SHORTS???


(From episode 19)

Heero never uses a holster he just has it SHOVED INTO THE WAISTBAND OF HIS SHORTS OR WHATEVER TROUSERS AND HOPES FOR THE BEST

(Heero's gun is never loaded canonically speaking otherwise I would severely question the middle finger he repeatedly gives to BASIC GUN SAFETY.)

But sure we'll just pretend Heero uses a holster and doesn't just do what every kid did in the 90s and early 00s and just shove shit in the waistband of our shorts or pants and hope for the best

Should I put them out of their misery as painlessly as possible like an angel of death?
Some of them had blankets wrapped around them with dirty spoons and syringes littering the floor.
Probably wouldn’t notice they’re dead, the drugs already did that.
not only are we going to shit on a bunch of homeless squatters we're gonna shit on homeless addicts as well I guess because why the fuck not???

He disengaged the safety. As he crept behind the first one, none of them realised he was even there. They weren’t even aware of anything anymore. Could they even feel?
At least I can give you some dignity.
He pressed the Beretta
Good to know in 2013 I was headcanoning Heero using a Beretta 92FS lmao 

to the back of their head before he pulled the trigger. The others didn’t notice a damn thing.
how zonked out of your mind do you have to be to not notice someone's head get partially blown away or at the very least not hear the fucking gunshot??? 

He shot the rest of them point blank, each slumping over on the floor. He wiped the blood off his face with the back of his hand before leaving it, jumping over the fence after getting a running start.
what a fucking sociopath 

He ran down the nearby hill, pretty steep—or steep enough—before flipping forward and rolling until he was on his back. He lay there for a moment or two to catch his breath and just bask in the sunlight
WHAT SUNLIGHT

like yes, there are designs for space colonies where you have basically mirrors that can let sunlight in and then block it out for nighttime but idk if this colony in particular has that in which case it's just a fuckton of lamps. 

when it was blocked by a silhouetted face.
“Are you lost?” It was the face of a little girl.
Aodhan blinked before sitting up. Was he lost? Physically, no, he wasn’t. Mentally?
“Hey… Did you hear me? You lost?”
Aodhan sighed. “I’ve been lost since I was a child.”
that's not how this fucking goes
"I've been lost ever since I was born." Literally uses umareta (past tense of umareru), "was born" (birthed).

She frowned as she bent over to pet her dog. “That’s sad to hear… Well I’m not lost! I know this place like I know my name!” She smiled proudly.
Aodhan guessed she couldn’t be older than eight years old.
“I take Mary here for walks every day.” She held out her hand, offering him a yellow flower—a dandelion, Aodhan guessed from the looks of things.
IN WHAT WORLD


(By Greg Hume - Own work, CC BY-SA 3.0, https://commons.wikimedia.org/w/index.php?curid=17890515)

THAT IS A DANDELION.

It's never mentioned exactly what flower it is that he's given it could be some type of Ranunculoideae (buttercup) like Ranunculus ficaria


(By user:Svdmolen, IJmuiden, the Netherlands - Own work, CC BY 2.5, https://commons.wikimedia.org/w/index.php?curid=709841)

 or it could be some kind of nasturtium WE JUST DON'T KNOW

what we do know is it's not a fucking dandelion

“Here, this is for you.” She smiled at him and Aodhan hesitantly took the flower before her dog barked and ran off, pulling the girl.
“Ah! Mary! Wait, Mary!”
He watched her run off before contemplating the flower. He placed it in the billfold section of his wallet
WHEN I READ THIS PART TO MY WIFE SHE LITERALLY SAID
"Wallet? What wallet?? Heero doesn't carry a wallet! He just shoves everything in his shorts!"

Meanwhile I was like "why the fuck would he put it in a wallet it would get crushed, the stem would get broken in half, what the absolute fuck"

I don't even headcanon him using a wallet, he uses a money clip. 

before getting to his feet. He had a few hours to plan everything and gather and build explosives. Then he’d have to plant them inside the old factory and rig them up so he could detonate remotely from a safe distance. Then it was just a matter of waiting.
waiting for what??? if he detonated everything, what would he need to wait around for? so he can be apprehended???

*

It was the dead of night as Aodhan checked his watch, self-detonation trigger in his hand. There would be no casualties
we're just gonna ignore the homeless people you shot and killed execution style I guess 
if everything went right and there was no reason why it wouldn’t. His watch beeped. Four in the morning. He pressed it
 

and five seconds later the first explosion went off, followed shortly by the second and third.
 
It looks to me like there are four explosions, not counting the one that sends a Leo into the fence and subsequent carnage.

Pieces of the building shot into the air and rained down on the ground. He watched it for a bit
 

before turning to walk away.


Mission complete.
No no he says that before turning to walk away like he's still got the detonator held up and—

A fourth explosion went off and Aodhan turned his head.
But there were only like, four explosions for the building I think, and then others that involved the Leos going down, and then of course that Leo that caused Problems...

There was only supposed to be three.
Trust me bro there were at least four.

He threw the detonator to the ground and ran back, only to watch debris knock into a mobile suit. It fell over the fence and landed on a nearby apartment complex
I am not entirely sure it landed on the building it would've more like "knocked into it" because it fell backwards so would've been like right by it 

before exploding,
which took out the building and set fire to like everything around it 

knocking Aodhan off his feet and knocking him senseless.
What are you talking about??? He was standing the entire time, he wasn't close enough to get caught up in the concussive blast.

Like I get it. This is technically an AU. But the problem is you are taking an event that happens in canon and have no real reason to even modify it so like. Why didn't you keep it the way it actually goes???

When he woke up, it was lighter out, and snowing—snow caused by the explosion.
Okay so... That might not have been Actual Snow. That was likely fallout from the explosion consisting of debris and ash (mostly ash in this case). But let's say it is snow, how would that happen? Basically you would have massive heat and smoke rising up into the air that then leads to the formation of clouds from that smoke hitting cooler air and that water vapor ends up condensing rapidly. That all ends up using the smoke and ash and whatever other debris and particulates hence the clouds and those clouds and result in things like snow.

Most likely it's actually ash and things like soot and dust.

The fires were out, the old factory completely gone, reduced to nothing. What was left of the apartment complex was nothing but ruins.
it...it wasn't just the apartment building... There were others involved too...

He carefully made his way through the debris, uncovered a somehow unharmed teddy bear lying on the ground.
 
Looks a little singed to me.

He appeared to be standing where a children’s bedroom once was. His eyes spotted something golden and fluffy and upon examining it closer, found it was the dog from earlier.


You know when I first watched EW and saw this scene, I literally thought Heero had only killed the puppy. It wasn't until a later scene where I learned he killed the little girl as well, which made me question having Heero as a favourite character, until like five seconds later when he says, "Tell me, Wufei. How many times do I have to kill that girl and her dog?" that I went "oh he's got remorse."

Oh no… He felt sick, his stomach churning over what he’d done. He dared to investigate the nearby area and found what was left of the little girl he’d met just a few hours before.
Younger me, do we really need details about the little girl? The dead puppy is more than enough and says everything that needs to be said. 

He dared not to try and dig for the missing pieces, and even if he did, his feet were rooted to the ground.
This wasn’t just a body. Aodhan had seen plenty of dead bodies, killed enough people to not be bothered by severed limbs and missing upper torsos.
This was an innocent little girl who had no reason whatsoever to die.
And he killed her.
He fell to his knees and vomitted.
Now I know what you're all thinking... "It was an accident. He didn't mean for her to die. It wasn't his fault!"

Yes, it was an accident, no it wasn't intentional, but yes, it was absolutely his fault because he detonated some shit and as a(n unforeseen) result of that, he caused not just the girl and her puppy to die, but countless others. Heero would've probably been fine if all he'd seen were a bunch of collapsed buildings and a bunch of charred, scorched, or singed things. If anything he could've excused it like, "Well those buildings were empty." Or that they were for the military personnel he blew up hours before. When you think of the casualties as buildings, teddy bears, furniture, and mobile suits, you create distance. You don't see human victims, just objects. It's easier to rationalise.

But Heero saw a body. Not just any body, but the remains of a puppy he knew belonged to a kid who was like, 6 or 7. Maybe as young as 5. And if the puppy didn't make it, her owner (and presumably her family) didn't either. And it wasn't just a random kid either, though that would've still been bad enough—it was someone he'd made some kind of connection with, however brief. She gave him something and he repaid her kindness by (accidentally, unintentionally) taking her life.

Heero doesn't know what to do with that, with something that personal. There really isn't anything he can do with that, except figure out where his life goes next. He's a soldier. This is a war. Civilian casualties are pretty common wherever the battles end up. Normal people regularly get caught in the crossfire somehow, usually by accident. Homes get toppled and destroyed. Lives are ripped apart. People have to leave everything they've known to go somewhere hopefully safer, out of the crosshairs.

Reality slapped Heero in the fucking face.
This is the price of war.
This is the price of freedom.
This wasn't the first innocent person to die and it certainly won't be the last.

So Aodhan falling to his knees like this is a rehearsed stage play, maybe with his hands out, before he vomits, doesn't really evoke anything in me. The devastation on Heero's face and in his eyes speak louder than any words or even actions ever could. He is horrified. He is traumatised. He is shell-shocked. This created a core memory for him that will never leave him. I'm not buying Aodhan's reactions. He doesn't read as human to me.

Heero does.

*

“Retrain him at once.”
Dr. J narrowed his eyes. “Are you out of your mind?”
Dekim frowned as he looked at Aodhan. “You know what I want in my perfect soldier. It must be obedient. it must kill without thinking twice. Feeling remorse over some little girl makes it pathetic! Kindness has no place in a weapon, Dr. J.”
“Do you really think you can kill off the boy’s humanity so you can use him to gain control of the world? Do you think Heero Yuy would approve of all you’ve done so far?”
Dekim laughed. “Heero Yuy is dead—he can’t spout his total pacifism bullshit at me any longer.”
Dr. J’s eyebrow twitched.
“Let me know when the defect is gone,” Dekim said, before leaving the meeting room.
Dekim Barton was never there he never fucking saw Heero!

Aodhan had failed, took innocent lives with his own two hands and for what? What did any of it even accomplish?
All he saw, as he looked at his hands, was blood. Red. The face of that girl. Aodhan hadn’t wanted this. Yet here he was, hands stained with dried blood only he could see, and dirt from digging a grave.
I do this a lot actually, the whole "my hands are stained with blood only I can see" thing, but in a much better way lol like Relena might see his hands as strong but gentle as he cradles their newborn but Heero in contrast is terrified and thinking about how the hands of a killer stained with the blood of the hundreds or thousands of people he's killed are touching something so innocent and precious, and how undeserving he is.

“Boy…”
J at this point would've been calling him "Beta" if you subscribe to FT. (Which I don't.)

Aodhan abruptly got up and left the room without saying anything. He needed to be alone.

*

He had no flowers or anything really, except for the teddy bear he’d found in the rubble.
and the flower you shoved in your fucking wallet 

He placed it on top of the fresh mound of dirt, cheeks wet. He forgot a while ago what water falling down your face even meant. He knelt there as a cool breeze ruffled his hair, right hand on the grip of his Beretta.
That isn't loaded.

How could he live with himself? What had she done to deserve the fate she did? Who gave him permission to play God?
I truly am worthless, he thought, as he lifted the gun to press against his temple.
That's not even a good place to shoot yourself in the head and you should know that.

Like I get it, he did that in Episode Zero, but still. He should know better. 

I’ve failed. I’m not human. I’m a monster. I’m not allowed to feel like this so why do I? Weapons are useless if they don’t work the way they should. They are tossed away in favour of ones that work. This is the least I can do for the world, ensure I’m never used to harm innocents ever again.
He squeezed the trigger.
Nothing happened.
I can’t even do this right.
lmao what a poor sack of shit

He racked the gun, expelling a bullet he’d destined for his brain. His gun jammed.
Beretta pistols are designed to not jam. Like the way the slide is engineered and such.

“How did you find me?”
I am reminded of that scene from Kill Bill Vol. 1 where Uma Thurman's character has started a new life and has friends and a husband-to-be and they're having a wedding rehearsal. She's pregnant. Bill shows up like "hey Kiddo" and she's just like "How did you find me?"

Dr. J, Aodhan noticed, did not come any closer. He stayed a good distance away. To not intimidate, most likely, or seem like a threat or like he was going to try and stop him.
When I look at Dr J I don't think "oh he's a threat, he's intimidating" I think "the fuck is up with this guy???"

“I have my ways,” Dr. J answered.
Which is basically what Bill answers with lol 

“I wanted to talk to you away from all the Romefeller asshole aristocrats and politics, boy. I have a proposition for you.”
Aodhan’s eyes narrowed. “The answer is no.”
“Don’t answer so quick. You might like my idea.”
Aodhan scoffed. “Anyone working under Dekim isn’t someone I feel confident trusting.”
Dr J like "listen I don't like him either nor do I trust him that's why you should trust me."

Dr. J took a couple of steps closer, hands will clasped behind his back.
“I don’t like Dekim’s ideas anymore than you do. Just hear me out.”
The wind ruffled his hair, sending a shiver up Aodhan’s spine.
“I’m listening.”
Dr. J grinned. “Good. You have three options right now.” He held up his hand, thumb extended. “One, you could continue being Dekim’s weapon.”
1 - You can continue with Operation Meteor as planned.

He extended his index finger. “Two, you could ignore Operation Meteor as Dekim Barton has it and work under my orders instead.”
2 - You can ignore orders completely and run away as soon as you arrive on Earth. 

He extended his middle finger. “Or three, you could kill yourself, which doesn’t solve anything and won’t bring that girl and all the people you killed back.”
3 - You do my version of Operation Meteor which only goes after the Alliance and OZ, i.e. those who are ultimately responsible for Heero Yuy's assassination.

Literally the options J gives Heero in the order that he gives him, and any time he wants Heero to pick the thing he wants, he puts it as option three, because Heero always goes for the third one. This is the second time, canonically, he has to make any kind of decision. The first time was with Darlian and the first attempt on his life where J was like, "You can either help with the assassination, completely ignore what's going on, or you can stop the assassination." Heero chooses to stop the assassination.

Aodhan sucked in a breath before he looked at the gun lying on his lap. He went back to Dr. J.
“What do I have to do for you?”
"get down on your knees"
...
yeah uh. yeah. 1xJ does exist I have seen fic of it on The Pit over the years and it's...really fucking weird and fucked up and weird and fucked up I REMEMBER THE FIC I READ TOO it was fucking weird.

*

Aodhan was strapped into the still open cockpit as he made final preparations and tweaks before take off. The mechanics were making their last minute checks, ensuring everything would work as it should.
“And from time to time I will give you mission objectives, so be on the lookout,” Dr. J said.
“Roger.”
“I should give you a codename since you don’t have a name you remember.
not what he says not what he says NOT WHAT HE SAYS 

How does the name ‘Heero Yuy’ sound?”
"Well someone fighting for Colonial independence and freedom for the Colonies should have a name that represents that, don't you think?"

Aodhan didn’t look up at all from the console screen.
“If that’s what you want to call me.”
Since he was fighting for the Colonies now, just like his namesake.
in two completely different ways lmao

“Appropriate for a soldier fighting for the peace of the Colonies, no?”
Dr. J walked away just as Aodhan, now renamed Heero, closed the cockpit hatch and completed preparations.
Mission 1: make entry to earth, land near designated point marked on GPS map screen. DO NOT BE SEEN ENTERING ATMOSPHERE.
fucked that up

“Mission accepted,” Heero said, hitting the return key to accept. Heero hit a few buttons and switches before pushing the throttle controls for the thrusters all the way forward before taking control and flying out of the hangar and into the beauty of space.
It’d taken a year to get to this point, and here he was again, out in space, going back to Earth.

Goddamn this is fucking awful. And it doesn't get better from here...