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After we move to the Southern Tier (not directly after but sometime after), I will be getting my name legally changed. Finally.
As a "fuck you" to Egg and a reminder that I'm no longer under her thumb nor am I in her sphere of control anymore. Considering she strictly forbade me from changing my name until she was dead... (It originally was 18 but then in typical narcissist fashion she kept moving the goalposts.) I was going to get it done secretly but then all of the shit hit the fan since October of last year and then it all exploded in March...it got shoved into the background because once again I was back to Survival Mode...and why wife was right in the trenches with me.
I don't use my legal name in most places IRL. Even work uses a shortened form of my legal name. My father- and stepmother-in-law don't even know my legal name—they call me "Kay" (as do my sisters-in-law on that side) with the exception of my brother-in-law who calls me "Hikaru" and my wife's maternal side who use "Karu".
But then there is the whole middle name situation. I hate my legal middle name. Everyone in my family does except my dad who is the one who picked it. It's after the woman who ended up as my godmother who kind of dropped off the face of the earth after he passed. So someone no longer in my life and who was never really important to me, one could argue. So. Initially I'd picked "Aiden", which is a name I do like still, but I've changed my mind and have instead chosen "Aleksey".
But isn't that the name of one of your alters?
Yes. Yes it is. That's intentional.
I want two middle names though, I've always wanted that tbh. When I was going to go with Aiden as my middle name, I was going to have "Elisabeth" with it because that was the middle name I was "supposed to have" and decided, when I was a kid, "I'll choose that as my Confirmation name." But since Egg wanted Elisabeth more than I did and I'm not too attached to the name, I'm gonna replace that with a different name.
But what one?
TIL that you can have a patron saint of either sex regardless of whether you are male or female. So males don't have to pick only male saints and vice versa. Which I didn't know. Probably because girls would be more likely to pick female saints and boys would be more likely to pick male saints. But then there's me.
I'm always the odd duck out with everything. For one thing, I opted to not go through with Confirmation, and caused a huge fucking scandal as a result. Like I'm not even kidding. People went to Rob about it in shock and he just kind of shrugged and said he had nothing to do with it. One of the priests called the house and spoke to Egg just like, "What do you mean they don't want to do Confirmation?! Are they sure?! Are they well???? Why would the child of the most devoutly Catholic family in our church not want to do Confirmation???"
Because I don't believe in any of that bollocks.
So what saint would I have actually chosen? Who's to say? I didn't really think about it because I wasn't going to need any kind of "patron saint". I was drawn to masc names though...so probably a masculine saint. Not like Saint Michael the Archangel (because my brother's name is Michael), but. [shrug]
I actually really like the name Sebastian. "San Sebastian" by Sonata Arctica is one of my favourite songs of theirs, and Saint Sebastian is actually rather popular with LGBTQ because a lot of the art, I guess, is very homoerotic.
Which tbf is a lot of art from that time of various Biblical figures.
But like. idk if I will do two middle names? Because that might be really unwieldy, especially for something like government issued ID.
like idk. Hikaru Aleksey Sebastian is p long. The surname I'm gonna use is only three letters so that works out...
I know ultimately it's up to me and whatever I want to change my name to and I could still have Sebastian in there "unofficially" because remember, I do have to justify why I want to change my name. Which is as simple as "I don't feel any connection to my birth name and am changing it to something that I connect with better." But still.
[sigh]
It's gonna end up costing me a bit but it'll be worth it to be able to legally use the name I've been going by since 2012.
As a "fuck you" to Egg and a reminder that I'm no longer under her thumb nor am I in her sphere of control anymore. Considering she strictly forbade me from changing my name until she was dead... (It originally was 18 but then in typical narcissist fashion she kept moving the goalposts.) I was going to get it done secretly but then all of the shit hit the fan since October of last year and then it all exploded in March...it got shoved into the background because once again I was back to Survival Mode...and why wife was right in the trenches with me.
I don't use my legal name in most places IRL. Even work uses a shortened form of my legal name. My father- and stepmother-in-law don't even know my legal name—they call me "Kay" (as do my sisters-in-law on that side) with the exception of my brother-in-law who calls me "Hikaru" and my wife's maternal side who use "Karu".
But then there is the whole middle name situation. I hate my legal middle name. Everyone in my family does except my dad who is the one who picked it. It's after the woman who ended up as my godmother who kind of dropped off the face of the earth after he passed. So someone no longer in my life and who was never really important to me, one could argue. So. Initially I'd picked "Aiden", which is a name I do like still, but I've changed my mind and have instead chosen "Aleksey".
But isn't that the name of one of your alters?
Yes. Yes it is. That's intentional.
I want two middle names though, I've always wanted that tbh. When I was going to go with Aiden as my middle name, I was going to have "Elisabeth" with it because that was the middle name I was "supposed to have" and decided, when I was a kid, "I'll choose that as my Confirmation name." But since Egg wanted Elisabeth more than I did and I'm not too attached to the name, I'm gonna replace that with a different name.
But what one?
TIL that you can have a patron saint of either sex regardless of whether you are male or female. So males don't have to pick only male saints and vice versa. Which I didn't know. Probably because girls would be more likely to pick female saints and boys would be more likely to pick male saints. But then there's me.
I'm always the odd duck out with everything. For one thing, I opted to not go through with Confirmation, and caused a huge fucking scandal as a result. Like I'm not even kidding. People went to Rob about it in shock and he just kind of shrugged and said he had nothing to do with it. One of the priests called the house and spoke to Egg just like, "What do you mean they don't want to do Confirmation?! Are they sure?! Are they well???? Why would the child of the most devoutly Catholic family in our church not want to do Confirmation???"
Because I don't believe in any of that bollocks.
So what saint would I have actually chosen? Who's to say? I didn't really think about it because I wasn't going to need any kind of "patron saint". I was drawn to masc names though...so probably a masculine saint. Not like Saint Michael the Archangel (because my brother's name is Michael), but. [shrug]
I actually really like the name Sebastian. "San Sebastian" by Sonata Arctica is one of my favourite songs of theirs, and Saint Sebastian is actually rather popular with LGBTQ because a lot of the art, I guess, is very homoerotic.
Which tbf is a lot of art from that time of various Biblical figures.
But like. idk if I will do two middle names? Because that might be really unwieldy, especially for something like government issued ID.
like idk. Hikaru Aleksey Sebastian is p long. The surname I'm gonna use is only three letters so that works out...
I know ultimately it's up to me and whatever I want to change my name to and I could still have Sebastian in there "unofficially" because remember, I do have to justify why I want to change my name. Which is as simple as "I don't feel any connection to my birth name and am changing it to something that I connect with better." But still.
[sigh]
It's gonna end up costing me a bit but it'll be worth it to be able to legally use the name I've been going by since 2012.
