[meta] it's what we're hardwired to do

So I'm finally catching up on the fics that I need to review (am currently going through To Freely Serve), and when it came time to review, I go through probably the same thing everyone else does.

"I have no crit for this chapter, what do I do?"

It's a dilemma I often face when I review for a story I really like. There's nothing wrong with it that I can see, so I have no advice to offer, and yet I don't want to be all, "I REALLY LIKED THIS!" either because, you know, there's no substance. Well maybe I can point out what I like! Well next thing my review is nothing but quotes and "I liked this!" after it. So then I am at a loss for words and end up just saying nothing at all, maybe saying something in a comment next time I see the author (if they're on LJ) saying, "Hey I read [insert fic here] and really liked it!"

Well then why can't I just say that in a review and just save myself all the trouble?

It's simple, really. Fandom has us hardwired. What do I mean by that? Well, fandom has Certain Expectations about reviews, as many of you know. Some of us don't care what kinds of reviews we receive, because a review is a review is a review. From the way fandom talks about these types of people, you'd think they were like dinosaurs--extinct for quite some time now, with a, "Well, we used to be that way, but then we got Standards."

Oh, really? Because I don't care what my reviews say, because reviews are nice whether they say, "I liked this!" or "MOAR PLZ," or are just paragraphs of things they liked or if it's light critique, heavy critique, or all the above. Because someone liked my fic enough to actually sit down and voice their thoughts about it.

But Fandom wants substance to reviews! You can't just leave something that says, "Hey, I read this and liked it a lot!" You have to tell what you liked and didn't like. It can't just be, "I liked this!" because pffft, that's just mindless praise. Properly spelled praise, but praise nonetheless. And as fanfiction writers, we want to improve, don't we? We don't want to be told what's awesome about our fic. We want to be thrown under the bus and told it's shit, right? WE WANT CRITIQUE.

Well wait a second. Now you're saying these things and complaining about reviews. You're not getting any, or not as many as you once were. This happened after you declared, "I want thoughtful reviews, not mindless praise like, 'I LIKED THIS!' and 'UPDATE MOAR!' and btw it has to be at least four hundred words," on your FFN profile. Or some variation thereof on FFN or elsewhere. Perhaps you said something on the anon meme and people knew it was you (or you de-anoned), or you posted it somewhere. WHATEVER THE CASE, you complained about reviews having to be a certain way, and now people aren't reviewing.

Why is that? You would automatically assume that they don't like your fic, though the favourite story add might say otherwise.

They are afraid to say anything. Why? Because it seems like everyone in fandom has standards for reviews that need to be met to be considered a 'review' or it's just 'mindless praise'.

I, like many of us, like well-thought out reviews will nicely written crit, quotes of things they liked, examples of things they didn't... All that wrapped up nicely with an, "I can't wait to see the next chapter," or whatever. I can even name people who give reviews like this, but I won't because you know I don't like naming names. If you look at the reviews for My Sins Won't Leave Me and scroll down, I think you know the people I'm thinking of.

I also like reviews that just say, "I liked this." You don't have to write a whole long, drawn out review for me. Really. It's okay.

But fandom has it hardwired into our brains that long, well-thought out reviews are the only ones worth giving. We are told this time and time again--"I only want thoughtful, well-written reviews." "I only want crit." So I can't just say, "I really liked this fic"? I have to say, "I liked it because...well. Insert Bullshit Reason here" instead?

Thinking reviews should conform to 'standards' marks you, in my eyes, as a review elitist. I am happy with whatever reviews I receive. But when it comes to giving reviews? I am horrible, because mentally I am going, "Is the author going to jump down my throat if I just say, 'Hey, this fic was great!'?"

I figure people would like having favourite lines mentioned, things the reader liked mentioned... All that stuff. I like it when people tell me what their favourite parts are, or if something works. (Or if something doesn't work.)

Apparently not. "Oh, these reviews are nice, but I wish there was concrit." Sometimes there just isn't concrit to be given.

In a fandom where there aren't a lot of reviews to be had, this is not the kind of place where you should be picky about the types of reviews we get. We should be happy someone bothered at all.

Oh, and btw, you also can't say who can and can't review your fics, and their reviews don't count as 'less' simply because it's Person H and Person O. Not only is it really elementary, but it's also, uh, douchey, and who the hell are you to say so-and-so can't review because, "Oh, they cause wank!" or something like that? Get over yourself. You are not the Fandom Police.

~*~

In the same vein--topic, really--I know this isn't standard and I have been a little lax in it lately (job hunting, FAFSA, etc.), but replying to reviews? It's nice. It's like receiving a present in the mail and then sending a thank-you--it should be second nature.

Well. Replying to reviews isn't, really. It used to not bother me if I was met by silence. People are busy, etc. But I picked up this habit from LJ, because it's a great way to have a conversation with someone about their fic.

This is just me, personally, but I (usually) reply to reviews. Because then A) the reviewer knows you read it and B) you are acknowledging your audience. You don't have to go into this long drawn out thing, just a nice, "Thank you for reading and reviewing!" would suffice if you're on a time crunch. Like I said, a review is like a present from someone. When you receive something from someone, or someone does something nice for you? You say "thank you" like your mother always said, because it was nice and they didn't have to do it at all. And whilst some gifts you'd be better off without--like that fugly sweater your Aunt Jane made for you for your birthday that's ten sizes too big and in a really unflattering colour--there are some that you're going to squee about and be really happy over. A review is one of those. So you should say, "Thank you!" because you know what?

No one is obligated to receive reviews.

Granted, you are not obligated to acknowledge them, but it is nice, and it is polite, because someone made the effort to at least tell you, "Hey, I read your fic and liked it."

~*~

I am just going to make this short and sweet and to the point.

You are not obligated to write things just because someone else wants you to.

End of.

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