It's a beautiful autumn day...
Nov. 16th, 2024 01:10 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
omaewokorosuLast night there was a beautiful full moon and it was an otherwise beautiful day.
Today the skies are without any clouds in sight and a beautiful light blue. Not too hot but not too cold either.
I wanted to wake up to Sadie jumping on the bed and meowing at us for her breakfast but she never did and never will again. Things are too quiet. For such a small cat (Sadie was 6 pounds until recently) she was very mouthy.
Went into the bathroom expecting her in her spot but she wasn't there either. Her little cooling mat was empty and cold. Her grooming towel was nearby.
We packed up some things in the bedroom that are important like the rest of my jewellery so we could bring that. Aleks packed her blanket and towel in there too.
Broke down retrieving her food dish from her spot filled with food from a few days ago when she would still eat but not a lot. We had to throw out the food of course but it was the last meal she ever had before she got too sick.
Aleks wants to set up her cardboard house at home to have a blanket for her to sit on "when she visits". He's gotten quite spiritual since Sadie left us. I think he's in denial. He's waiting for her to come home.
She will of course. But not in the form he's so familiar with. She will arrive in a nice box. We plan on getting something nice to hold her in. Serena and I were looking at Cuddle Pets, handmade memorial plushies that are made to look like your beloved pet.
Almost $400 but it would be worth it because then we could hold her again in the form we are so familiar with. There's a pouch to put the ashes in.
I found one of her favourite collars. Cried again. I have times where I don't cry of course, but I spend a lot of time either crying or trying not to.
Bitty still looks for her. I'll pet her and say something like, "Are you looking for Sadie?" She gives me a look like she understands me. Like she is still looking for the sister she loved so much even though her sister was old and crotchety at times. Sadie still loved her. In her own way.
I tell Saru, "I'm still looking for her too."
I'll always be looking for her.
There was a post in r/catdistributionsystem of someone who found a grey tabby. The stripes weren't the same (his stripes were more like our furniece's), but the face was like Sadie's.
He has green eyes too. Like hers. Though in my opinion hers were prettier. Our green eyed girl.
It hurts and I know it will hurt for a long time. I'm not looking for a replacement for Sadie because I will never find one. Nothing can replace our Grey Lady, she is one of a kind. And I know wherever she is she misses us too. She wants our pets and kisses and snuggles.
I'd do anything to hear her meow again. To feel her making biscuits. To hold her one more time.
I'll look for you everywhere. Always. In the stars at night, in the moon up in the sky, in every grey tabby I see in the hopes the Cat Council sent an Earthly Representative of you to us to check in.
She was 16 years old. She was healthy until suddenly she wasn't. Full of love until the very end when she left us. She was ready. We've had her since 2019. It wasn't enough time. We could've had her for 20 years and it still wouldn't be enough time. There never is.
I miss my baby. But I don't regret anything. I knew she was in such pain and I didn't want her to have to endure any further agony. She's no longer hurting.
If only we could've stopped the pain without her having to leave us.
Today the skies are without any clouds in sight and a beautiful light blue. Not too hot but not too cold either.
I wanted to wake up to Sadie jumping on the bed and meowing at us for her breakfast but she never did and never will again. Things are too quiet. For such a small cat (Sadie was 6 pounds until recently) she was very mouthy.
Went into the bathroom expecting her in her spot but she wasn't there either. Her little cooling mat was empty and cold. Her grooming towel was nearby.
We packed up some things in the bedroom that are important like the rest of my jewellery so we could bring that. Aleks packed her blanket and towel in there too.
Broke down retrieving her food dish from her spot filled with food from a few days ago when she would still eat but not a lot. We had to throw out the food of course but it was the last meal she ever had before she got too sick.
Aleks wants to set up her cardboard house at home to have a blanket for her to sit on "when she visits". He's gotten quite spiritual since Sadie left us. I think he's in denial. He's waiting for her to come home.
She will of course. But not in the form he's so familiar with. She will arrive in a nice box. We plan on getting something nice to hold her in. Serena and I were looking at Cuddle Pets, handmade memorial plushies that are made to look like your beloved pet.
Almost $400 but it would be worth it because then we could hold her again in the form we are so familiar with. There's a pouch to put the ashes in.
I found one of her favourite collars. Cried again. I have times where I don't cry of course, but I spend a lot of time either crying or trying not to.
Bitty still looks for her. I'll pet her and say something like, "Are you looking for Sadie?" She gives me a look like she understands me. Like she is still looking for the sister she loved so much even though her sister was old and crotchety at times. Sadie still loved her. In her own way.
I tell Saru, "I'm still looking for her too."
I'll always be looking for her.
There was a post in r/catdistributionsystem of someone who found a grey tabby. The stripes weren't the same (his stripes were more like our furniece's), but the face was like Sadie's.
He has green eyes too. Like hers. Though in my opinion hers were prettier. Our green eyed girl.
It hurts and I know it will hurt for a long time. I'm not looking for a replacement for Sadie because I will never find one. Nothing can replace our Grey Lady, she is one of a kind. And I know wherever she is she misses us too. She wants our pets and kisses and snuggles.
I'd do anything to hear her meow again. To feel her making biscuits. To hold her one more time.
I'll look for you everywhere. Always. In the stars at night, in the moon up in the sky, in every grey tabby I see in the hopes the Cat Council sent an Earthly Representative of you to us to check in.
She was 16 years old. She was healthy until suddenly she wasn't. Full of love until the very end when she left us. She was ready. We've had her since 2019. It wasn't enough time. We could've had her for 20 years and it still wouldn't be enough time. There never is.
I miss my baby. But I don't regret anything. I knew she was in such pain and I didn't want her to have to endure any further agony. She's no longer hurting.
If only we could've stopped the pain without her having to leave us.
